Six Weeks In

We’ve been in lock down for six weeks and it’s suddenly the beginning of May. So where do we stand?

Unfortunately, we really are not much better off than we were 6 weeks ago. Testing remains a frustrating pipe dream and cases are continuing to rise. As of today there are over 62,000 people dead from this disease. The guy in the Oval continues to lack any kind of coordinated response to this so it’s only getting worse. I can’t believe I have to document this but he has even suggested that we inject disinfectant into our bodies in order to kill the virus in “under a minute.” Lysol literally had to tweet to please not ingest their product in any fashion and emergency response lines across the country got calls from people asking if they could safely do this. And yet people will defend him and say “watch the video, that’s not what he said, he was talking about [insert obscure medical procedure that Trump has no knowledge of].” For the record, I did watch the video. He wasn’t kidding, he wasn’t being sarcastic – he was dead serious and it was fucked up.

And yes, that’s what he claimed. He claimed that he was being “sarcastic” to see what the media would do. That’s a lie, let’s just start there. But EVEN IF you were to suppose that he WAS being sarcastic, how is that at all helpful at a time like this? How does that display leadership or care for this country? How does that calm scared people at a time when accurate information is our best tool? It’s not funny. It’s dangerous.

In other news, some states are beginning to reopen. Georgia did it first and their cases never stopped rising. The Governor there basically said hair salons, bowling alleys, nail salons, etc could reopen. So. What that means is that if the business refuses to reopen they lose state aid because well, they COULD be doing business. If they do reopen and their workers refuse to return, those workers lose UI benefits. It’s all a ploy to get the state out of paying money they likely don’t have and it is disproportionately affecting people of color. On the day that the state began to reopen, 1000 new cases in the state were reported.

Pennsylvania is beginning a staged reopening plan. We are remaining on a statewide shelter-in-place order until May 8th. Then, a block of counties in northwest/north central part of the state will be reopening on a limited basis. Stay at home will be lifted in those counties and retail and daycare may reopen but gyms, barber shops, nail salons, casinos, theaters, and similar will remain closed. The counties chosen have a low rate of infection. The remaining counties, including mine, will remain on strict shelter-in-place – the same thing we’ve been doing for 6 weeks. When the data tells us it’s safe to begin to reopen they will allow us to go back to our lives.

I’m terrified of this. I can’t lie.

Meanwhile, out Michigan way, armed protesters stormed the state house in Lansing and screamed to be let onto the state floor where debate was occurring. Yes, armed. They carried assault weapons with them. (And don’t get snotty with me on definitions. I’m not dumb, ok? They brought weapons of war to the State House. The end.) They screamed in the faces of the Sergeants-At-Arms. 1) If they were black, they’d be dead. 2) That is an armed insurrection. One dingbat dropping his weapon and having it accidentally fire and you end up with civil war. Their issue, you ask? They don’t like being told to stay home and they want the Governor to open the state and let people die. And before you dismiss them as lunatic fringe (they are), please remember that lunatic fringe has done WHOPPING loads of harm throughout history and the recent past is no different. They scream bloody murder that the government has no right to tell them what to do with their bodies. I assume that’s as long as you’re not a woman pregnant with an unwanted baby.

Things are basically falling to pieces here. I’m not scared when I walk out my door so much as scared of the greater whole. I’m scared of what is going to happen next – or more accurately, what is NOT going to happen. I feel entirely powerless to change anything. I obey the orders. I stay home. I wear a mask when I need to leave my house. I follow appropriate precautions. But none of that is making any difference and we still have that excrescence of a President.

I was thinking yesterday about how April was so slow and so fast all at once. On April 1st, the end of the month and the end of lock down seemed so far away. We got to April 30th and I looked around and thought “how the fuck did that happen?!” What I concluded is that we started April thinking we had a chance to get this under control and now we’re here at the end and we’ve improved nothing. We look around and think “well, still in this exact spot.” No wonder it seems like time both dragged and flew past. Nothing changed to make it feel like it was progressing.

States around the country are starting to make noises about the students not going back to buildings in the fall because it won’t be safe even then. I become a deer in the headlights when I contemplate this. Jamie begins middle school in the fall. That transition is hard at the best of times and he is already having weekly meltdowns over 5th grade work that is largely busy work. There’s very little new material being dealt with. Starting him into middle school remotely makes me want to heave. We can’t go back to buildings if we don’t have widespread testing and possibly a vaccine. I’m convinced at this point that we will never be testing appropriately and the vaccine is still at least a year away. I just don’t even know what to do with the helplessness I feel in the face of things I can’t change or control.

We aren’t even close to the end of this thing and there’s no telling in what ways this is all going to get worse. But at this point I’m pretty certain that it will get worse before it’s better.